Well it had to happen, we are offically “on a break”.
I can honestly say it’s not him, it’s definitely me – I just need to spend some time thinking about what I want out of this relationship.
Unfortunately, this means for next however many weeks, I will not have the yielding, subservient company of the novel.
It’s funny to think we only met, properly, June 2014, but since then, wow, it’s been a whirlwind.
OK, that’s enough…
What Have I Learned?
I’m currently giving my space away from my first completed novel draft. It’s been an amazing experience and I hope i’ve learned some stuff so far. What that is I do not know, but in writing this and the next couple of posts I’ll fathom it out a while.
The first thing is that I do not know how I coped before?
These last two weeks, where I have been so consciously avoiding anything to do with the novel, have been dull. Not when I have been busy with family and so on, but in all those moments where pleasure must come from self-motivation.
It acted as another space to occupy. The mind could wander there, not consciously but becoming simply safe, away from stress and annoyances.
Without it, as I look at the screen in my living room, the sun is bright and warm, the birds singing, my mind stays either stuck here and the minutes slow, or else it skitters to anxieties and memories, and parading amongst these leaves me looking away from anything.
But only four weeks to go, although how I will get on without anything to distract me from work…
LEARNING 1: PREPARE FOR THE ABSENCE OF WRITING